Fear of Missing Out: Getting Work Done While Feeling Sick

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Daily Zen Living / Zen Office Hours

No loss, only Change

Dear friends,

How are you today? Did you have a great weekend?

My throat feels like I just swallowed a handful of needles and spikes. My head feels heavy and my eyes burn. I get shivers down my spine. And yet, here I am, saying “Hello”.

Today, especially since it’s Monday, I felt like if I started my week with a pause, I would be missing out on a lot. I know it sounds silly and that this is fear creeping in again, but have you ever had this fear of missing out? Like you would miss an opportunity of some sort, if you don’t show up or take on a certain assignment?

Where the heck is this coming from? You must excuse my language, but this how I speak when I’m sick.

Fear, you ugly thing, are you stalking me again? Even on my sick days or is it especially then? Well it suuuure seems like it!

Ladies and gents, we have a classical case of FOMO – aka Fear of Missing Out.

This was me this morning: feeling sick and sleep-deprived, with a running nose and a burning forehead. I got up, checked my cell phone, logged into facebook and BAM!

I saw people posting like crazy on social media, taking pics while working out, or on their way to work, or while getting ready to drink their green power juice. And I felt like crap.

I had a minimum level of energy, just enough to get to the bathroom and then to come back to bed, but waves of panic rushed into me, so I quickly jumped in the shower, put some make-up on and opened my laptop.

I didn’t even want to consider the option of resting, taking my medicine and going back to bed. Oh no, to miss all the fun? The excitement of a new week? The rush hour? The one thousand tweets per minute? No, Sir! I was up and running. And feeling like crap.

Then, as I began to feel even worst, physically speaking, I questioned myself on where did this FOMO come from. As always the right answer came through: my FOMO comes from a place of lack.

My fear was fueled by the (crazy) idea that whatever I might be missing out on today, would never show up again in my life. I feared that opportunities would be just around the corner waiting to meet me and I, sick as I was, would fail to show up and take them. Hello, Crazy-land!

I’ve been fearing that I would be left out and that extraordinary things would happen in my absence.

I even remember where and when I picked up this crazy idea. It was back in my schooldays, when almost every time I would get sick and stay at home, my classmates would have the time of their life doing this or that (which of course, only really happened maybe once). And so, the adult me, unconsciously created a negative pattern around this idea.

As I sat and thought more about this topic, tons of memories from my early adolescence and adulthood came into mind: times when I felt left out, forgotten about and missed out on all the fun. This pattern got me to a feeling of permanent guilt whenever I couldn’t (or wouldn’t)  show up at an event or when I canceled a meeting.

Even to this day, it still wrings my heart, when I can’t make it someplace. Exactly like I did this morning when I decided I just couldn’t sit in my bed and recover, but that I had to work or produce something just like everybody else. See where I’m coming from?

Anyway, this idea of missing out & the root of it (the scarcity of opportunities etc.) are actually in contradiction with my new belief system, which states that:

Whatever I need is there for me in the Universe.

What that means is that I believe in an abundant, resourceful Universe, where there are not only a few opportunities, a few magical encounters or a few fun events to attend or interesting people to meet, but a lot of them.

Sure, every day counts and every opportunity matters, but we don’t have to beat ourselves up or blame ourselves if at one point we just can’t make it/ show up/ take the opportunity.

The essential thing is to remain as supportive of yourself as you can be and to:

Trust that Life will know when and most importantly, what to bring (again) before you at the perfect time.

Maybe you can relate to this, maybe you feel like you’ve been missing out on a great job offer or a marriage proposal, or a super cool travel deal. But know this from me and mark my words for it:

New and sometimes, even better opportunities will show up again.

I promise you that! Only next time you will be more prepared to receive them. So, no regrets, no “I wish I had”, none of that.

If you’re sick like I am today, and I really hope you’re not, but just in case you are, allow yourself time to relax and recover. This is also available for me and at the end of this post, I will jump in my pj’s and make myself a tea and then do nothing except for recovering.

Fear of missing out? Begone!

I’ve just scratched you off my list. And I do hope that you, my dear readers, did as well.
If you are still feeling some kind of FOMO, let me know in the comments below and I will be more than happy to help you crack the problem wide open.

Sending you much love,
Bianca Zen 2


*image source theinfinitesparkofbeing

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